Collide

[This was written on the 9th of September by the way]

Have you ever listened to a song that you've known for so long, and have it feel like you're listening to it for the first time? Almost like it's a completely different song all together? Well, that happened to me just recently. As I was vacuuming, believe it or not.

But before I start on about that, let me tell you about my day so far. I woke up on time, showered and got ready for school. Because it was so quiet in my house, I lost track of time. Normally, my sisters are downstairs eating and my parents will be in the living room or just shot downstairs to make sure everyone is up and awake (this is only during the first part of the school year, then after a while, my parents won't even wake up). My youngest sister, Abbey, is sick, so she stayed in bed and my mom stayed in her room. Ashley stayed upstairs until the last possible moment, then she quietly snuck out to the bus. I didn't hear her go out, and I didn't hear anyone else, so I figured it was still early. But no, apparently I missed the bus. So I went upstairs to ask my mom what happened to my sisters, and she said that Abbey was in bed and Ashley made the bus. So I said, "Well, I guess I missed it then, since I'm still here." And she got mad and said that she'll take me later. Turns out "later" was non-existent. So I ended up doing chores all day and listening to my music.

Now it's raining and thundering out, and I have a shaking German Shepard under my feet. Blitz doesn't like storms at all. The one thing I want to do more than anything in the world right now is to go outside and run, jump, dance, anything, in the rain. I have this urge and it's killing me to sit here and watch the rain fall down. I wonder what my mom would do if she came home from the doctors office with Abbey, to find me dancing around the yard in the pouring down rain.

I don't normally get these kind of urges, honestly. Maybe it has to do with me being all ready to go to school this morning, only to, well, not.

My day is actually going by really, really slowly. It's only 1pm, and it feels like it should be 5pm.

So I guess I'll get back to that song I was talking about in the first paragraph. Remember that song, Collide by Howie Day? (Go ahead, get your laughs out before I continue.)


Well, I was vacuuming the living room (Yes, it is crucial for you to know what I was doing and where I was at that exact moment!) and this song came and I naturally started singing along because I know all the words. Then, somewhere around two minutes in (it's a four minute and nine second song FYI), I stopped singing, and stood there, replaying the words I just sang in my head. Then I started the song over and actually listened to the words. It was as if I was listening to a totally new song that I've never heard before. But only a couple verses now that I think about it.

I'm actually (for lack of a better word) "afraid" to talk about who and what I was thinking about during my listening to this song. But, if you know me well enough, and you listen to or read the words, then I'm sure you'll understand exactly what I'm talking about. It's just that I don't want to seem overly eager or anything. Maybe I'm thinking about it too much, or wanting something to happen too much. I don't know, I've been doing a really good job (if I do say so myself) of being patient and letting whatever is going to happen, happen and try not to expect anything to actually happen. (See? I'm reading too much into it already!) I guess I'm approaching this situation expecting the "worst" to happen. If things turn out that way, then you're not so upset because it's what you're expecting. But if things turn out better than expected, then you're very, pleasantly surprised.

Wow, I definitely rambled on there. I didn't even talk much about the song!

I guess what I was trying to say, is that I never really listened to the song until today. And then I realized how "I can relate to it". blahblahblahh. (What a powerful ending!)