Whoa... That's Deep

Well it's in the middle of my random winter break, in the middle of February. It's 4:00am Friday morning, and I'm wide awake so I guess there's no reason to fall asleep now. And I'm spending this Friday morning, sitting around in my room, downloading pod casts and newly exposed music.

Lately, when I hear something new, I get this smile on my face that just won't go away. I literally get excited about the new artist I have just discovered and I find my self not being able to wait until the next time I can tell Jess. Just a half hour ago I was listening to Kate Voegele and I kept saying to myself, as I listened to the words and read the lyrics, "Wow, Jess is so going to be able to relate to this song." or, "Ah, I can't wait, she'll love this melody" or, "Aw, this song is cute, she's going to love singing this one, I can picture it now..." Yes Jess, I think about you when I listen to certain music. =]

So I was also listening to Peyton Sawyer's Podcast, from One Tree Hill (the television show). I know her podcasts aren't actually about her real life, but they're about her life in the show. And the things she talks about make me feel so inspired to write or, in this case, type. She talks about so many topics that I think about but keep to myself because I'm not able to put those thoughts into words. Right now, at 4:27am, I feel inspired and motivated enough to type something up. And as you can see, I haven't written in over a month, so I guess I'm due for another blog entry.

One of the things Peyton talked about was death. No, not in a suicidal way. She was talking about what happens to people after they die, and where their souls go. Are they still around, watching over everyone they care about? Or are they on their way to heaven, or hell, to spend the rest of time there, waiting for their loved ones to come? Or does nothing happen at all, do they just die and cease to exist? She didn't exactly say all of those things, or ask those questions, but she did talk about them in different, but similar ways.

I've lost several loved ones in the past 17 years of my living, and I have wondered what actually happens when you die. How do you feel once you take your final breath? What are you thinking during your final thoughts? It's scary to think about I'm beginning to realize, but it's reality, and that is what's scary.
When you're at someones funeral or burial or wake, where are they? Are they able to see you? Think about you? Let you feel their presence? So many unanswerable questions can be asked and it's both frustrating and mind-boggling at the same time. It makes me curious mainly because nobody really knows what death is like. Nobody has experienced death and came back to tell everyone about it. No one can really talk to the dead and ask them how they felt as they were dieing. "Psychics" can't talk to ghosts and actually expect everyone to believe that what they're saying isn't a creative imagination or (as some may even say) a lie. The shows we watch on television where people go into "haunted houses" to talk to the ghosts that dwell there, can't be taken seriously. Especially with the technology we have now. It's just a waste of time and I think that they are misleading everyone about what happens to people who die. (Just so you know, after talking about ghosts, I turned on my light because I was starting to scare myself a little.)
I honestly do believe that people stay here after they die, they stay until they are certain that they're loved ones, or even they're not-so-loved ones are taken care of. I also believe that there are "lost souls" that will never be able to Rest In Peace because of things left unsaid or undone. That's why I strongly believe, that if you have something meaningful to say or something that you really care about or something that you really, really believe in, you should let it be heard. Tell as many people (or even the one person it'll affect) as you can. You should let your feelings show and be seen and be known. You should make sure that everyone knows you for who you are, and not who they think you are from their first impression of you. Let yourself be known to as many people as you can and let yourself shine in the spotlight that you deserve. So when it's your time to let your soul exit your body and move on to the next life or into nirvana or where ever you believe it may go, you can rest peacefully and you'll be remembered as someone who wasn't afraid to show who they really are inside and what they're capable of. You'll be remembered as someone who was passionate about the things they believed in. You'll be known for who you really are. And most importantly, you'll be known.